Friday, July 13, 2012

The World of Warcraft is not real and my name is not Ivyhoof.

It's Falon.


After being moved by Battle Chicken's post from a personal understanding of what she has went through, I decided I would take her july challenge and make a personal post about myself.
The real life character behind the druid.
So some of you may know and some of you may not, I take LOTS of medications.  Medications for bi-polar and anxiety disorder, PLUS sleeping issues.

Now back in last October, my husband and I were on shaky ground. He was in Germany at the time and I was stuck in Japan. I discovered some other things and went into a fast spiral down into a pit where I staid for a long time.  Nothing in real life mattered to me. Not eating, sleeping, my family, nothing.  I lost myself in wow. That's where my friends were and when they were on was the only time I laughed. Why they were better then my real life friends I'll never understand.

I ignored my health.

My hygiene.  Shower? Whats that? Pfttt, brush my teeth.

My pets. I NEVER took them outside. As a result they used the house as their personal potty grounds.
Yes it was gross but every time I stepped outside of my room and saw it I cried and went back to the safety of my computer.

About a month of this and being on suicide watch I woke up one morning and went, "What the hell am I doing?"

I knew better then this.

I called my doctor and went on some medications, called my friends for help with my wrecked home and started trying to piece everything back together.

I made them swear to drag me outside even if I hissed when they called or came by.

My husband came home and we started working on things, slowly. When he heard what happened he paniced a bit and was really worried but I wouldn't talk to him then.   Things are getting better in that department.

Here's us a few months after my ordeal.

WoW is still a huge part of my life. I'm a horribly bored stay at home wife who just cooks and cleans and plays a video game.  

All my friends are else where in the country, hell the world, so the only way to talk to them without phone bills is WoW.  Only made 2 friends while here. 

One I geek out in D & D with.

The other...... tries to "make me into a girl."
How she makes me feel sometimes.

Without having a car it's hard to get out there and make new friends. 

It's hard having something out of the house to do.

So for now... my husband my friends (no matter where you are) and wow are my life.

Still working on balancing stuff but the good thing is that I AM trying to work on it.

I'm trying to find cheap hobbies to occupy me, but those are few and far between.

Back in Misawa, snowboarding was huge for me. Until I developed some irrational fear of hurting myself.  

video
See. No fear here.

I'll force myself back on my board or my skis this winter.


I also enjoy putting together gundams. Though I'll have to use the powers of the internet to get them now.

My first and only one. I got started late.
You wouldn't believe it by looking at it but one small part has about 12 other small parts in it. 0.o

We should be getting a car soon and hopefully I can find a job to sustain a new hobby.

Thats about it for now. If you guys have ideas for hobbies please feel free to post in the comments. I'm up for trying anything!

Till next time, good hunting!










2 comments:

  1. It's incredibly easy to completely lose yourself in wow to escape reality. I'm very much guilty of the same. I'm really glad to hear you're slowly piecing things back together remember it's a marathon not a sprint.

    I'm amazed at your courage to be so open and honest <3

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  2. You might still be struggling with the balance and getting a life outside (hey, car and money are very real limitations!), but look how far you've come! I think you have the right to be proud of yourself.

    When you look at where you were and where you are now, have hope--you've got this. <3

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